Second time in the space of a few weeks that they’ve rang me to say Edward haven’t any lunch and would I please drop by and bring him his lunch or should they take him to the canteen to order some?

Now for one I don’t think in my right mind would I name my kid Edward? Unless I’m having a senior’s moment? 

For two the phone number was interstate so don’t think I’ll be dropping off his lunch any time soon.

For three the person who answered the phone greeted me with a Good afternoon . For goodness sake I know it’s Monday and it’s only 924am please get your act together?

For four please delete my number off your emergency contact list and update it as if one day something happens to Edward you’re going to have a court case on your hands when you can’t contact the parents. Touchwood.

For five please don’t make me have to ring you again. Interstate calls are expensive. This is the second time that I’ve phoned.